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The Donnybrook
Thursday, August 24, 2006
 
You'd Be Pissed Off Too If You Lived In A Soulless Plastic Jungle...

This makes so much sense to me...
Welcome to Orlando, the City Wrathful, where stress soars and rage runs
rampant.


The news that Men's Health magazine has ranked Orlando the angriest of 100 major U.S. cities has some locals hot and bothered -- kind of.

...

Three other Florida cities were in the top 10: St. Petersburg, Miami and Jacksonville. Tampa was 12th. The coolest heads prevailed in Manchester, N.H.; Bangor, Maine; and Fargo, N.D., all in chilly climates.
Get ready to douse your drawers at this next comment, which may be the very embodiment of the word "denial":

Orlando lawyer Dennis Salvagio couldn't believe it when heard about the ranking."How can they say that of a city as beautiful as ours?" Salvagio asked.

"Haven't these people been to New York City?"

This guy's got it: Orlando obviously has it all on NYC.

Who needs actual culture when you can slap giant mouse ears on everything in sight and watch the money flow in?

Who needs quality neighborhood restaurants when you can have every pre-fab shit-sucking chain restaurant under the sun crammed into a 90 mile area?

Who needs temperate weather when you can watch your skin turn bright red by merely stepping outside to water your lawn?

Who needs the Empire State Building when you've got the glorious SunTrust Center?



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