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The Donnybrook
Monday, January 31, 2005
 
Keith Olbermann Bitch-Slaps Mullah Dobson...

He was great on ESPN, but he is just phenomenal on MSNBC...

He may be the only truly moderate voice on any of the 24-hour news channels. Not to mention he often has the absolutely yummy Alison Stewart fill in for him when he takes time off...

It seems that Dr. James Dobson, American Mullah of virtues and values, is a little embarrassed at all the attention his "SpongeBob SquarePants-is-a-homosexual" conspiracy theory has garnered.

Logically, he's decided to lash out against Keith Olbermann...Hilarity ensues...

Mother used to insist that there were two things you should never talk about in public: politics and religion.

Now, of course, that’s all we talk about. But the moral guidance still rings loudly all these years later, and it always makes me a reluctant conversant, even if I apologize to Mom in advance.

However, the Three-Card Monte Players at Dr. James Dobson’s “Focus On The Family” have reopened the can of worms that is SpongeBobGate, and have focused not on the family but on me, and in so doing embarrassed themselves and undermined the validity of their own concerns.

Dobson, you will recall, joined the singularly inoffensive animated character “SpongeBob SquarePants” to his conspiracy theories of a “pro-homosexual” agenda, in order to get headlines. When he got those headlines, he promptly complained about getting them. Dobson, like many other exploiters of Amoral Values, ran immediately to the easiest way out of a stupid fix of his own creation: he blamed the big old ugly media.

UPDATE: Haloscan is behaving badly today, so please direct all comments to the smaller "comments" tab next to the time stamps at the end of each post.

2nd UPDATE: When in doubt, read the first UPDATE...

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Friday, January 28, 2005
 
Mitt Romney Is A Pussy...

I don't know any other way to refer to a guy that's afraid of a Philly cheesesteak because of it's high fat content.

Say what you want about John Kerry, who looked like a bit of a douche when he requested a cheesesteak with Swiss cheese (yack!), but at least he ate the damn thing!

Gov. Ed Rendell and Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney have finally agreed on their Super Bowl wager, after Rendell's food-focused idea fell flat.

The losing governor will travel to the other team's state and, during a match between the cities' NBA teams, sing the Star-Spangled Banner in his rival city's jersey, Rendell said Thursday.

At least Romney will sing if the Philadelphia Eagles beat the New England Patriots. If the Eagles lose, Rendell's wife will sing for Boston Celtics fans. Midge Rendell, a federal judge, is a trained opera singer.


Romney turned down Rendell's initial offer of Philadelphia cheesesteaks, saying they were too high in fat.

Romney "is a little thinner than I am, and he's a little bit more health-conscious,'' Rendell, well-known for his large appetite, said with a laugh. "And he said - can you believe this? - that there is no food in Philadelphia that's healthy.''

What a wuss...

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I Have No Idea What To Make Of This...

Dick Cheney shows up to a ceremony at Auschwitz looking like he just shoveled his driveway.

I know I can be a little picky about our pals in the Bush regime, but seriously, WTF???

The Washington Post reporter raises an interesting point:

Just last week, in a frigid, snow-dusted Washington, Cheney sat outside through the entire inauguration without so much as a hat and without suffering frostbite. And clearly, Cheney owns a proper overcoat. The world saw it during his swearing-in as vice president. Cheney treated that ceremony with the dignity it deserved -- not simply through his demeanor, but also through his attire. Would he have dared to take the oath of office with a ski cap on? People would have justifiably considered that an insult to the office, the day, the country.

UPDATE: Here's a shot of Uncle Dick taking the oath of office last week.

Compare and contrast...

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Bush Administration Completes The Hat Trick Of Propoganda...

Propoganda: It's not just for third-world dictatorships anymore!!!

From Salon:

One day after President Bush ordered his Cabinet secretaries to stop hiring commentators to help promote administration initiatives, and one day after the second high-profile conservative pundit was found to be on the federal payroll, a third embarrassing hire has emerged. Salon has confirmed that Michael McManus, a marriage advocate whose syndicated column, "Ethics & Religion," appears in 50 newspapers, was hired as a subcontractor by the Department of Health and Human Services to foster a Bush-approved marriage initiative. McManus championed the plan in his columns without disclosing to readers he was being paid to help it succeed.

Responding to the latest revelation, Dr. Wade Horn, assistant secretary for children and families at HHS, announced Thursday that HHS would institute a new policy that forbids the agency from hiring any outside expert or consultant who has any working affiliation with the media. "I needed to draw this bright line," Horn tells Salon. "The policy is being implemented and we're moving forward."

First Armstrong Williams, then Maggie Gallagher, now McManus...

Who's next on the Bush administration's propoganda payroll?

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Thursday, January 27, 2005
 
Check Out Today's Calvin & Hobbes...

Just hilarious.

Hits a little too close to home, too...

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Wednesday, January 26, 2005
 
Bush Launches A Snot Rocket At Senior Citizens...

From AmericaBlog, Commander Bunnypants took a shot at a reporter who dared ask a question about his plans to gut Social Security during today's presser:

Q I seem to remember a time in Texas on another problem, taxes, where you tried to get out in front and tell people it's not a crisis now, it's going to be a crisis down the line -- you went down in flames on that one. Why

--THE PRESIDENT: Actually, I -- if I might. (Laughter.) I don't think a billion-dollar tax relief that permanently reduced property taxes on senior citizens was "flames," but since you weren't a senior citizen, perhaps that's your definition of "flames."

Q I never got my billion

--THE PRESIDENT: Yes. Because you're not a senior citizen yet. Acting like one, however. Go ahead. (Laughter.)

Q What is there about government that makes it hard -

-THE PRESIDENT: Faulty memory. (Laughter.) Go ahead. (Laughter.)

Get it??? Old people can't remember stuff!!! It's an Alzheimer's joke!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAA!!!!!

Somebody call Nancy Reagan...

UPDATE: Here's the video of Dear Leader being a punk-ass...

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White House Admits Another Record Deficit Is Coming...

I love the Bush administration approach to releasing bad news: Release the news, but attach a line of complete bullshit to try and dampen the blow...

The White House says its drive to halve federal deficits by 2009 remains on track, though it projects that the cost of wars in Iraq and Afghanistan will help drive this year's shortfall to a record $427 billion.

The figure, provided by a senior Bush administration official who briefed reporters on condition of anonymity, was among a flood of numbers released Tuesday that underscored a gloomy budget picture.

The nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office said projected deficits for the decade ending in 2014 had grown $503 billion worse than it calculated in September, excluding war costs. The deterioration was chiefly due to tax cuts and hurricane aid enacted since then.

P.S. China has the US dollar by the balls. Tell a friend...

UPDATE: Check out this chart prepared by the non-partisan Congressional Budget Office showing budget deficits/surpluses from 1992 until the present...

Very telling...

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Today Was The Deadliest Day For U.S. Forces In Iraq...

Unreal...

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- A U.S. Marine Corps helicopter crashed early Wednesday in west Iraq, near the border with Jordan, killing 31 Marines, military officials said.

The CH-53 Stallion crashed near Ar Rutbah in western Iraq at about 1:20 a.m. local time (5:20 p.m. Tuesday ET). It was carrying personnel from the 3rd Marine Aircraft Wing and the 1st Marine Division.

Military officials said a search and rescue team was at the site and an investigation of the crash was under way. It was not immediately known if the helicopter crashed or was shot down.

In a separate incident, four Marines were killed in action Wednesday during combat operations in Iraq's Al-Anbar province, according to a military news release. The Marines were assigned to the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force. Ar Rutbah is also in Al-Anbar province.

Elsewhere, a U.S. soldier was killed Wednesday when insurgents attacked a combat patrol with grenades near Ad Duluiyah, military officials said.

When does it end?

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Tuesday, January 25, 2005
 
Harry Reid Lays Out The Democratic Agenda...

This is a great move by our new Senate minority leader, a guy who is officially climbing the charts of my favorite politicians.

Sen. Reid outlined "The American Promise" today. The "Promise" is a list of the 10 bills that will be sponsored by Democrats in the Senate over the 109th Congress.

These bills reflect the keys to the Democratic agenda: Security, Opportunity, and Responsibility...

Reid's new Senate War Room is already hard at work exposing the Bush agenda, and has already got the White House back on it's heels in the upcoming Social Security fight.

Click here if you'd like to co-sponsor the new Democratic agenda...

Indeed, I truly underestimated Sen. Reid's ability to take over as minority leader.

He's already 10 times the leader Tom Daschle ever was...

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Bush Taps The Congressional ATM Again...

$80 billion more for our little experiment in Iraq? No problem?

$1.5 billion just for a US embassy in Baghdad? Big friggin' deal!!!

Don Juan astutely points out what else will be costing us $1.5 billion dollars:

You know what else is going to cost $1.5 billion? The Freedom Tower, being built on the former WTC site.

What the hell kind of embassy are we building?

Good question...

UPDATE: In a related story, the Congressional Budget Office is already projecting a $368 billion budget deficit for 2005. Keep in mind that this figure does not include the aformentioned $80 billion that will be tossed down the bottomless pit that is Iraq...

$368 billion+$80 billion=$448 BILLION BUDGET DEFICIT.

Last year's record deficit was $412 billion.

Nothing fuzzy about that math...

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Monday, January 24, 2005
 
My Hero From The Eagles' NFC Championship Victory...

No, it wasn't Donovan McNabb, Brian Westbrook, or either of the Lewis's, although they deserve nothing but praise.

Surprisingly, it was Timmy Kelly.

Don't know who he is? If you saw the national anthem performed before yesterday's game, you know who he is.

Timmy's bio from the Eagles playoff run last year tells the story of no ordinary 10-year-old kid. Timmy was born prematurely with mild cerebral palsy and without sight.

What he can do is sing. And sing he did. I really hope you guys saw it...

Brian Murphy talks a little bit about Timmy's performance in his "The Hangover" column on ESPN.com...

The key moment, when we all knew it was to be Philly's Day, was when little Timmy Kelly, blind and stricken with cerebral palsy, belted out a national anthem that had even hardened Philly fans -- the ones whose lifetime of cheesesteaks have spawned the hardest of arteries -- drying moist eyes.

The good sign for the Eagles wasn't so much Little Timmy's beautiful effort. It was the fact that, incredibly, nobody booed the kid.

It was then, and only then, that I saw clear sailing for Iggles Nation.


From where I was standing, Timmy had several of the players and a few of the military personnel at the game in tears.

I have to admit that the room got a bit dusty for me, too...


P.S. This intro to the Eagles website just gave me chills on top of my goosebumps...


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Friday, January 21, 2005
 
It's Time To Focus On A Serious Threat Right Here In The U.S...

Yesterday, Dear Leader took it upon himself to declare that it is our duty to spread "freedom" throughout the world:

"So it is the policy of the United States to seek and support the growth of democratic movements and institutions in every nation and culture, with the ultimate goal of ending tyranny in our world."

Presumably, by "every nation and culture", he actually meant "every nation and culture not called Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Kuwait, or Uzbekistan".

And by "democratic movements" he probably meant "democratic movements not centered in Venezuela".

But I digress, for I feel it's time to address a threat that has been allowed to foment for far too long. Unlike the phony threat posed by Saddam Hussein halfway around the world in Iraq, this one is occurring within our borders and is very real.

I'm talking about Ashlee "Don't call me Fredo" Simpson.

This untalented genetic anomaly has been allowed to spread her brand of musical diarrhea for far too long, and I feel it's time that sane Americans stood up and proudly said "NO MORE".

Toward this end, I implore you sign this petition calling for the immediate cessation of Ashlee Simpson's singing career.

The movement started at the Orange Bowl, but only you can help this dream become a reality...

Think of the children...

UPDATE: DailyKos is doing a good job of exposing some of the brutal regimes that Dear Leader is tight with...Ashlee Simpson still sucks...

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Thursday, January 20, 2005
 
Happy Inauguration Day!!!

Since his post was so perfect, I'm going to basically steal shoveldog's idea here. Forgive me...

First, is an awesome clip of Vanity Fair's Judy Bachrach blindsiding one of the Foxymorons about the gawdy pricetag of today's "festivities". This has to be seen to be believed. The "prayer service" exchange truly brightened my day...

Next, is the greatest headline in the history of headlines:

Poll: Nation split on Bush as uniter or divider

Simple pleasures are indeed the best...

F The President, because he's gonna F us!!!

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Wednesday, January 19, 2005
 
There Is No Crisis.com

A great resource for cutting through the steady stream of bullshit coming from the White House regarding Social Security.

Don't believe the hype...

UPDATE: Click here to read all about how the White House is forcing the Social Security Administration to spend it's own money to promote his privatization scheme.

Great idea, isn't it?

First, Bush claims that Social Security is on the brink of collapse, then he makes the program use its own supposedly-dwindling funds to bankroll his bullshit scheme...

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Tuesday, January 18, 2005
 
A Comment For Anyone Who Would Rather Have Peyton Manning On Their Team Than Tom Brady...

When the hell are you going to wake the f*ck up???

Let me make this simple for you:

Tom Brady is Joe Montana (Good numbers, multiple Super Bowl rings)
Peyton Manning is Dan Marino (Amazing numbers, subject of pity for having ZERO Super Bowl rings)

Ask yourself, would you rather have a 2-time regular season MVP leading your team, or a 2-time Super Bowl MVP...

The University of Tennessee didn't even win a national championship until the year after Manning graduated...

Wake up, people...

UPDATE: Here's an awesome observation by The Sports Guy regarding the colossal failure that is Peyton Manning...

They didn't just beat the Colts, they decimated them. Best of all, Manning was shaking his head and blaming everyone else, like he always does when things go wrong. Marino did the same thing. And he never won a Super Bowl either.

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Friday, January 14, 2005
 
Should We Start Calling It The War FOR Terror?

The CIA seems to think so...

Iraq has replaced Afghanistan as the training ground for the next generation of "professionalized" terrorists, according to a report released yesterday by the National Intelligence Council, the CIA director's think tank.

Iraq provides terrorists with "a training ground, a recruitment ground, the opportunity for enhancing technical skills," said David B. Low, the national intelligence officer for transnational threats. "There is even, under the best scenario, over time, the likelihood that some of the jihadists who are not killed there will, in a sense, go home, wherever home is, and will therefore disperse to various other countries."


And here I thought we were going into Iraq to get rid of terrorists...

President Bush has frequently described the Iraq war as an integral part of U.S. efforts to combat terrorism. But the council's report suggests the conflict has also helped terrorists by creating a haven for them in the chaos of war.

"At the moment," NIC Chairman Robert L. Hutchings said, Iraq "is a magnet for international terrorist activity."

And now, for my Chevy Chase/Generalissimo Francisco Franco bit:

"There are still no WMD's in Iraq."

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Two Quick Things...

1.) These folks have got a great idea. I'm ordering my bracelet today. You can even send your proceeds to charity...

I'll be wearing mine next Thursday. :-)

2.) What are everyone's feelings on Rachael Ray? Hot? Not hot? Annoying? Psychotic? I don't feel bad about asking this since, as far as I know, no women read my site...

Please discuss...

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Thursday, January 13, 2005
 
Christian Group Trying To Convert 300 Muslim Tsunami Orphans...

Thanks to Jamz for bringing this to my attention.

WorldHelp, a Christian missionary group, is using the tsunami disaster in Asia in order to convert some now-orphaned children to Christianity.

That literally redefines the word "opportunism"...

"Normally, Banda Aceh is closed to foreigners and closed to the gospel. But, because of this catastrophe, our partners there are earning the right to be heard and providing entrance for the gospel," WorldHelp said in an appeal for funds on its Web site this week.

The appeal said WorldHelp was working with native-born Christians in Indonesia who want to "plant Christian principles as early as possible" in the 300 Muslim children, all younger than 12, who lost their parents in the tsunami.


"These children are homeless, destitute, traumatized, orphaned, with nowhere to go, nowhere to sleep and nothing to eat. If we can place them in a Christian children's home, their faith in Christ could become the foothold to reach the Aceh people," it said.


I'm guessing this may not go over well with most Muslims in the area. The backlash is already beginning...

UPDATE: WorldHelp is already backing off it's plan to convert the aforementioned orphans. I hope the damage hasn't already been done...

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FDR's Image Being Used To Promote Destruction Of His Signature Achievement...

(from DailyKos)

The idea of using Roosevelt's image in order to push for the dismantling of Social Security is just about par for the course at this point. Take a look at this ad from an anti-Social Security campaign.

Just seeing images of FDR and Dubya in succession makes Dubya look like even more of a numbnuts, if that's possible...

Luckily, I'm sure I'm not the only one that will notice the glaring difference in stature between the two...

UPDATE: FDR's grandson has come forward to condemn the use of his grandfather's image in this B.S. ad. Good for him...

It has come to my attention that your organization has begun running an advertising campaign to promote President George W. Bush's plan to privatize Social Security and cut benefits. The advertisements that are currently being aired feature President Franklin Delano Roosevelt and his signing of the original Social Security legislation. I find the use of my grandfather's image and legacy in your campaign to be highly inappropriate.

For seventy years, Social Security has been the bedrock of retirement security for millions of Americans thanks to the efforts of President Roosevelt. My grandfather would surely oppose the ideas now being promoted by this administration and your organization. Not only that, but to compare the courage it took to provide a guaranteed insurance program for our seniors and the disabled to the courage it will take to dismantle the most successful social program in history is simply unconscionable. We should be working to protect and promote Social Security, not cutting benefits for our seniors.

On behalf of my family, I would ask that you cease using my grandfather's image in your advertising campaign.

Respectfully,
James Roosevelt Jr.


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Rathergate vs. WMD-Gate...

The Poor Man's tale of the tape says it's not even close...

Also, take a look at the AP's comparison of Bush administration comments on WMD before and after the war...

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Wednesday, January 12, 2005
 
Pro-Lifers = Phonies

I like the Bull Moose's take on the inherent paradox presented by pro-lifers' complete lack of regard for the health and well-being of children after they've been born.

First, the Moose discusses the fact that Cuba (yes, that Cuba) has a lower infant mortality rate than the United States.

Then, he lets loose with some sobering truths about the hardcore pro-lifers currently invloved in the abortion debate nationally:

When was the last time that you heard fervent conservative pro-lifers decrying the sad state of maternal health care in America? Have you heard the voices of stalwart supporters of "the culture of life" such as Dr. Dobson, Reverend Falwell, Senator Santorum or President Bush promoting the extension of health care benefits for children?

And where is the National Right to Life Committee opposing the Administration's plan to cut future Medicaid benefits that provide coverage for poor mothers and children? Actually, the Right-to-Life Committee devoted considerable energy to oppose campaign finance reform but it is AWOL on the pro-life issue of infant mortality. And it appears that we have a greater infant mortality crisis than a social security crisis!

Actually, President Clinton was objectively far more supportive of a "culture of life" than President Bush. Abortion rates declined during the Clinton years and that Administration strongly supported maternal health care and providing health care coverage for children.

I've got a hypothetical question for the hardcore conservative pro-lifers out there:

If raising your taxes by 250% would ensure that there would never be another abortion in this country EVER, would you pay?

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Tuesday Morning Flurry Of News...

Officially no WMD's in Iraq. Tell us another one...

The 2005 Presidential Inauguration: brought to you by GE, Exxon, and Altria...

The US trade deficit hits an all-time record high of $60.3 billion...GOP will say that's good.

The US dollar continues diving through the floor...GOP will say that's even better.

Simon Rosenberg kicks ass for DNC chair. Let Dr. Frank tell you why...

LiberalOasis explains why Bush is suddenly on his own in the Social Security fight.

How great is this exchange from yesterday's "town-hall" meeting where Bush was tossed scripted questions by supporters of his Social Security scheme? Needless to say, Dubya fucked up the script...

MS. STONE: I would like to introduce my mom. This is my mother, Rhoda Stone. And she is grandmother of three, and originally from Helsinki, Finland, and has been here over 40 years.

THE PRESIDENT: Fantastic. Same age as my mother.

MS. STONE: Just turned 80.

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Tuesday, January 11, 2005
 
REPOST:Bush Forces D.C. To Pay For His Inaugural With Homeland Security Funds...

(Reposted because the comment thread attached to this topic devolved into a football thread. Whether that was an intentional move by my conservative friends is still unknown. We'll talk football later in the week, boys...)

In his defense, though, it's gonna be one killer party!

D.C. officials said yesterday that the Bush administration is refusing to reimburse the District for most of the costs associated with next week's inauguration, breaking with precedent and forcing the city to divert $11.9 million from homeland security projects.

Federal officials have told the District that it should cover the expenses by using some of the $240 million in federal homeland security grants it has received in the past three years -- money awarded to the city because it is among the places at highest risk of a terrorist attack.

But that grant money is earmarked for other security needs, Mayor Anthony A. Williams (D) said in a Dec. 27 letter to Office of Management and Budget Director Joshua B. Bolten and Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge. Williams's office released the letter yesterday.

Is this merely a partisan dust-up? Not quite...

A spokesman for Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.), chairman of the House Government Reform Committee, which oversees the District, agreed with the mayor's stance. He called the Bush administration's position "simply not acceptable."

Now would be a good time for a quick review. A president that achieved re-election based on the perception that he would be better at "securing the homeland" has done the following since achieving said re-election:

1.) Nominated a thug like Bernard Kerik to become the next head of the Department of Homeland Security without bothering to properly vet his sordid background.

2.) Demanded that the District of Columbia dip into money needed to protect the city in order to pay for his own already overblown inauguration.

Way to think it through, America...

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Bush Forces D.C. To Pay For His Inaugural With Homeland Security Funds...

In his defense, though, it's gonna be one killer party!

D.C. officials said yesterday that the Bush administration is refusing to reimburse the District for most of the costs associated with next week's inauguration, breaking with precedent and forcing the city to divert $11.9 million from homeland security projects.

Federal officials have told the District that it should cover the expenses by using some of the $240 million in federal homeland security grants it has received in the past three years -- money awarded to the city because it is among the places at highest risk of a terrorist attack.

But that grant money is earmarked for other security needs, Mayor Anthony A. Williams (D) said in a Dec. 27 letter to Office of Management and Budget Director Joshua B. Bolten and Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge. Williams's office released the letter yesterday.

Is this merely a partisan dust-up? Not quite...

A spokesman for Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.), chairman of the House Government Reform Committee, which oversees the District, agreed with the mayor's stance. He called the Bush administration's position "simply not acceptable."

Now would be a good time for a quick review. A president that achieved re-election based on the perception that he would be better at "securing the homeland" has done the following since achieving said re-election:

1.) Nominated a thug like Bernard Kerik to become the next head of the Department of Homeland Security without bothering to properly vet his sordid background.

2.) Demanded that the District of Columbia dip into money needed to protect the city in order to pay for his own already overblown inauguration.

Way to think it through, America...

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Monday, January 10, 2005
 
White House: Armstrong Williams Should've Kept His Mouth Shut...

And no, I'm not being dramatic about press secretary Scott McClellan's explanation of the White House's payola to conservative commentator Armstrong Williams.

Take a look:

"Questions have been raised about that arrangement, it ought to be looked into, and there are ways to look into matters of that nature," McClellan said. The spokesman did not say precisely who should look into it, and stopped short of backing an inquiry by the department's inspector-general, as some lawmakers have sought. He noted that department lawyers have taken up the matter.

"There are also questions about whether or not this commentator should have been disclosing the information publicly," McClellan said.

Translation: Take your payola and keep your yap shut...

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Arthur, Barney, Blue's Clues, Bob the Builder, Pooh, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Dora the Explorer, Jimmy Neutron, Kim Possible, Lilo & Stitch, Little Mermaid, Madeline, The Magic School Bus, The Muppet Show, Rugrats, Sesame Street and SpongeBob SquarePants

What do all the aforementioned popular characters and children's shows have in common?

If you said "they are all part of a vast homosexual conspiracy", the American Family Association would like to give you some literature.

Apparently, those characters were all part of a remake of the song "We Are Family" that promotes (gasp!) tolerance.

From AgapePress:

It is as unprecedented as it is cunning, using all the right words and happiest faces in an attempt to speak directly to the nation's children about "tolerance and diversity." Once again, of course, those ideas include homosexual advocacy.

On November 10, 2004, a video remake of the song, "We Are Family," was created using the voices and images of over 100 beloved children's TV characters. On March 11, 2005, the video performance will air simultaneously on the Disney Channel, Nickelodeon and PBS. A similar video aired on those networks in 2002.

I never knew what existed in the dark heart of SpongeBob SquarePants...

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My Wife And I Sold Our House In ONE DAY...

Whether that is a record or not is certainly not for me to decide, but check out this timeline:

Friday afternoon: House listed for sale.
Saturday morning: First walk-through by prospective buyer.
Saturday afternoon: Offer made by prospective buyer.
Sunday afternoon: Offer accepted by us.

Seriously. It's not usually this easy, is it?

I must have a horseshoe up my ass...

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NC GOP Congressman Howard Coble Wants US Out Of Iraq...

Spin for me, righties...

U.S. Rep. Howard Coble, dean of the state's congressional delegation and an avowedly strong supporter of President Bush, says it's time for the United States to consider withdrawing from war-ravaged Iraq.

Coble, a Republican from Greensboro, is one of the first members of Congress -- Republican or Democrat -- to say publicly that the United States should consider a pullout.

The 10-term congressman, head of the House Subcommittee on Crime, Terrorism and Homeland Security, said he is "fed up with picking up the newspaper and reading that we've lost another five or 10 of our young men and women in Iraq." [...]


Coble said he arrived at his position only after many months of searching in vain for evidence that the Bush administration had a post-invasion strategy to deal with the transition to Iraqi self-government.

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Friday, January 7, 2005
 
White House PAID TV Host To Promote "No Child Left Behind"...

Ladies and gentlemen, your tax dollars at work!

Seeking to build support among black families for its education reform law, the Bush administration paid a prominent black pundit $240,000 to promote the law on his nationally syndicated television show and to urge other black journalists to do the same.

The campaign, part of an effort to promote No Child Left Behind (NCLB), required commentator Armstrong Williams "to regularly comment on NCLB during the course of his broadcasts," and to interview Education Secretary Rod Paige for TV and radio spots that aired during the show in 2004.

Williams said Thursday he understands that critics could find the arrangement unethical, but "I wanted to do it because it's something I believe in."

The top Democrat on the House Education Committee, Rep. George Miller of California, called the contract "a very questionable use of taxpayers' money" that is "probably illegal." He said he will ask his Republican counterpart to join him in requesting an investigation.

If Williams was such a big believer in NCLB, why did he need to be paid $240,000 to promote it?

UPDATE: Democratic Senators Harry Reid, Ted Kennedy, and Frank Lautenberg have sent a letter to President Bush regarding his administration's propaganda tactics. They really tear him a new asshole...

In addition to the illegality of these actions taken by your Administration, we believe that the act of bribing journalists to bias their news in favor of government policies undermines the integrity of our democracy. Actions like this were common in the Soviet Union, but until now, thought to be long extinguished in our country.

These revelations regarding Mr. Williams are the latest – and most disturbing – in a series of actions by your Administration to manipulate public opinion through covert propaganda. On May 19, 2004, the GAO found that your Administration illegally spent taxpayer funds on covert propaganda by paying Ketchum Incorporated to produce fake news stories promoting the image of the new Medicare law.

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I Learned A Very Important Lesson Last Night...

Never (and by "never" I mean "NEVER") eat a burrito with hot sauce ONE HOUR before a swimming class.

I swear my ass must have looked like the back end of the Batmobile...

I can't be saved. But for the love of God, SAVE YOURSELVES!!!

In my mind, this lesson will long outlast "Never piss into the wind" and "Don't eat the yellow snow"...

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Thursday, January 6, 2005
 
Why Did I Change The Damn Channel???

I watched almost 3 quarters of Tuesday's horrendous Orange Bowl, and only turned the channel long enough to miss Ashlee "Fredo" Simpson getting booed out of Pro Player Stadium.

Call me a victim of my own painfully short attention span...

UPDATE: MSNBC has a poll up asking if fans should have booed poor Ashlee "Ozzie Canseco" Simpson. Let them know what you think...

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Repealing Bush's Medicare Giveaway Could Solve Social Security "Crisis"...

Take a look at this report from the GAO. Within it, you'll find the following:

"The new drug benefit is one of the largest unfunded commitments ever undertaken by the federal government. The Trustees of the Social Security and Medicare trust funds will include an official estimate of the discounted present value cost of this new benefit over the next 75 years in their annual report, which is scheduled for issuance today. Preliminary estimates of its long-term cost range up to $7-8 trillion in discounted present value terms over a 75-year period."

The GAO's 75-year estimation of the Social Security shortfall? $3.7 trillion.

As Maxspeak points out, Dubya could solve the alleged Social Security "crisis" TWICE by simply repealing his wasteful Medicare drug scheme.

Since the Medicare drug giveaway is quite possibly the only issue that hardcore GOP'ers will allow themselves to disagree with Dear Leader on (although they may be faking), this seems like a fair topic to address...

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Wednesday, January 5, 2005
 
While Bush Is Ripping "Frivolous Lawsuits"...

...don't forget that he is guilty of the exact thing he now feels is destroying our country.

From TomPaine.com:

As Texas Governor, George W. Bush was one of the "tort reform" movement's biggest proponents. One of Bush's first acts as governor in 1995 was to meet with representatives of nine Texas Citizens Against Lawsuit Abuse (CALA) chapters in a salsa factory outside of Austin, after which he declared a legislative "emergency" on "frivolous lawsuits." Over his two terms, Bush signed a series of brutal bills that severely reduced injured consumers' rights to go to court.

However, when it comes to solving problems involving his own family, Bush heads straight to court. In 1999, Bush sued Enterprise Rent-A-Car over a minor fender-bender involving one of his daughters in which no one was hurt. Although his insurance would have covered the repair costs, making a lawsuit unnecessary, Bush sought additional money from Enterprise, which had rented a car to someone with a suspended license. In this case, Bush seemed to understand one of the most important functions of civil lawsuits -- to deter further wrongdoing. The case settled for $2,000 to $2,500.


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Tom DeLay Chooses Some Timely Scripture At The Congressional Prayer Breakfast...

In light of the 150,000+ dead in Asia, this is a pretty brazen choice by the Bugman...

"Matthew 7:21. Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
22. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? And in thy name have cast out devils? And in thy name done many wonderful works?
23. And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
24. Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
25. And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
26. And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand:
27. And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
28. And it came to pass, when Jesus had ended these sayings, the people were astonished at his doctrine:
29. For he taught them as [one] having authority, and not as the scribes."

P.S. This is not a dig on religion, so spare me. It's a dig on an insensitive asshole that the GOP Congress would sell itself down the river to protect...

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Kerry Was Right About W's Plans To Cut Social Security Benefits...

Congratulations, America! Way to think it through!!!

From Factcheck.org (October 18, 2004):

A Kerry ad claims "Bush has a plan to cut Social Security benefits by 30 to 45 percent." That's false.

From yesterday's Washington Post:

The Bush administration has signaled that it will propose changing the formula that sets initial Social Security benefit levels, cutting promised benefits by nearly a third in the coming decades...

...White House aides have told lawmakers and aides that Bush will propose the change in the benefits formula...

...According to the Social Security Administration's chief actuary, a middle-class worker retiring in 2022 would see guaranteed benefits cut by 9.9 percent.

By 2042, average monthly benefits for middle- and high-income workers would fall by more than a quarter.

A retiree in 2075 would receive 54 percent of the benefit now promised.

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Tuesday, January 4, 2005
 
2005's "Social Security Crisis" = 2002's "Weapons of Mass Destruction"

Certainly, I don't mean to imply that Tom Tomorrow is stealing my ideas, but you gotta love the comparisons in his latest cartoon...

Speaking of Social Security, Paul Krugman is beginning a series detailing why, in his words, "privatizing Social Security is a fake solution to a fake crisis."

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That Didn't Take Long, Part II...

Extremism is a fucking poison. Muslim extremism, Jewish extremism, Christian extremism, whatever...Fundamentalism breeds hatred.

Case in point: Fred "God Hates Fags" Phelps is "thanking God" again for the tsunami disaster in Asia...

Last time, he was glad that 2,000 homosexual-loving Swedes were dead. Now, he's thankful for the death of "another 3,000 Americans". You can probably figure out what that means...

Take a look at the lovely flyer Phelps' church is distributing...

On my last Phelps post, I received some flak for connecting Phelps to the likes of Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, and the rest of the Religious Right.

Lets look at their respective records on 9-11 and the tsunami, shall we?

Exhibit A: Phelps "thanks God" for 9-11 while Falwell and Robertson merely said "we deserved it"...

Exhibit B: Phelps says "God sent the Muslim planes" on 9-11, while Falwell and Robertson strongly insinuated that the terrorists were carrying out the will of God...

Exhibit C: Phelps is "thanking God" for the tsunami. Falwell, Robertson, and most of the Religious Right are silent and, in fact, seem very disinterested in paying the disaster any mind at all.

Doesn't seem like that much of a stretch, does it?

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Monday, January 3, 2005
 
Bush's Claims on Social Security: Bullshit...

In a terrific editorial, The New York Times explains why the core tenet of Bush's claims of a looming Social Security crisis is total bubkis...

If you've lent even one ear to the administration's recent comments on Social Security, you have no doubt heard President Bush and his aides asserting that a $10 trillion shortfall threatens the retirement system - and the economy itself. That $10 trillion hole is the basis of the president's claim last month that "the [Social Security] crisis is now." It's also the basis of the administration's claim that the cost of doing nothing to reform the system would be far greater than the cost of acting now.

Well, the $10 trillion figure is the closest you can get to pulling a number out of the air. Make that the ether. Starting last year, as the groundwork was being set for the emerging debate, the Social Security trustees took the liberty of projecting the system's solvency over infinity, rather than sticking to the traditional 75-year time horizon. That world-without-end assumption generates the scary $10 trillion estimate, and with it, Mr. Bush's putative rationale for dismantling Social Security in favor of a system centered on private savings accounts.

A prediction for 2005: "Social Security crisis" will replace "Weapons of Mass Destruction" as Bush's #1 fear-inducing phrase this year...

For more awesome 2005 predictions, check this out...

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Bush Does The Right Thing...

Even if it is a symbolic gesture, Dubya did the right thing by bringing in his father and Bill Clinton to solicit donations for relief efforts in South Asia.

This instance can also serve as a shining example of how criticism and rattling some cages can get things done.

At first, all the Bush administration could muster was a paltry $35 million in aid, and Bush couldn't be bothered to comment for 2 whole days. Members of his team even got in shots at President Clinton, who had already stepped up and lent an American voice to the relief effort.

Then, the noise coming from those who felt the Bush administration hadn't done all it could became too loud to ignore.

Now, at least $350 million in aid is promised to the region, and 3 US presidents are on the job.

Say what you will about criticism of the handling of a disaster such as this...it worked.

Kudos to President Bush for getting it right, even if it wasn't immediately...

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An Early Morning Football Flashback...

Here's a comment I made a week and a half ago in a post detailing why the Philadelphia Eagles are still the team to beat in the NFC Playoffs after I was warned to "Fear the Kitties"...

I am saying the Kitties won't make the playoffs. They had it last year, they just don't have it this year. If they do squeak in, they won't win a game against Green Bay, Minnesota, St. Louis, or Seattle. They're a tough team, but I just don't see it...

Brian Email Homepage 12.21.04 - 10:29 am #

Goodnight, nurse...

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