Note to the Phillies: Please, DO NOT sign this man!!!

The Phillies are looking at possibly picking up the toxic Gary Sheffield off the MLB scrap heap.

Bad idea.

Plain and simple, Sheffield is an asshole. A TOTAL ASSHOLE.

How much of an asshole? So much so that over his 21-year career, he's played for a whopping SEVEN teams.

He's enough of an asshole that the next home run he hits will be the 500th of his career. Only 24 other players in MLB history have hit that many homers in their career, yet the Tigers are more than happy to put him on waivers today.

I particularly love this comment about Sheffield from The Fightins, a great Phillies blog:

"The dude is practically tailor made for the Mets - he’s old, he’s an outfielder, he’s an asshole. Who gives a shit if we’d pay him the league minimum to crank 15-20 HR off the bench. He’s still Gary Sheffield, and Gary Sheffield ain’t no Phillie."

The Phillies are the defending World Fucking Champions because they are a team of good guys who genuinely enjoy playing with each other. They have each other's backs.

Whose back has Gary Sheffield ever had, other than Gary Sheffield's?

Enough said. DON'T PICK HIM UP...

UPDATE: Like they were reading from a script, the stupid Mets picked up Sheffield today.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
- posted by Brian @ 9:22 PM